BOOKS |

Read this, sound smart.

Never stop learning. If anything, that’s what growing up with Oprah taught us. Alas, between everything else we already have to do and deal with – jobs, families, lives – most of us don’t have time to hoof it on down to the community college for some adult education. What to do? Read your way to smart-town, that’s what. Here, we look at three books of factoids that will help you become a (less nerdy) Ken Jennings.

What Canadians Think (About Almost Everything) by Darrell Bricker & John Wright | Random House Canada

From the stats men over at Ipsos Reid – Canada’s largest research and public opinion firm – comes this book on the workings of the minds of our friends and neighbours. The book moves from the mundane to the ridiculous. For example, that Canadians work an average of 47.5 hours a week to that 30% of Canadians chose Homer and Marge when asked to identify which fictional couple best typifies their current relationship. And it’s bursting at the seams with percentages and graphs.

A quick flip through will either immediately turn up something surprising (Quebec – not British Columbia – is actually the province most likely to support the decriminalization of marijuana) or land you mired in pages of pure boredom. What sucks about this book is that it is dense and dry if taken in large doses. What’s great about it is that it’s based entirely on professional research from a reputable organization. Ipsos-Reid is used by journalists and pundits all over the country, and knowing what they know is sure to make you sound as plugged in and sharp as you know you are (and they don’t have to know you aren’t.)

Jacket: Atomic Wedgies, Wet Willies, & Other Acts of Roguery, 2005

The Skeptic’s Guide to the Paranormal by Lynne Kelly | Thunder’s Mouth Press and Avalon Publishing Group

This utterly unscientific book may not be from a reputable organization, nor backed up by serious research, but it’s fun. And it’s still full of good info to bust out at parties. Comprised of pictures and light (and I mean very light) text, this pseudo-scientific paperback offers case-by-case explanations for twenty-seven phenomena that “appear to defy known science”.

It tackles spontaneous combustion, the Bermuda Triangle, alien abductions and poltergeists, and while it’s no episode of Myth Busters, the book’s bite-size, non-academic explanations are easy to swallow and fun to consider. 

Atomic Wedgies, Wet Willies, & Other Acts of Roguery by Greg Tananbaum and Dan Martin | Santa Monica Press

Opinion and ghosting not your thing? How about atomic wedgies and soda explodas? If you’ve got a ten year old trapped inside you, this practical guide to pranking is a sure bet. It features 50 illustrated pranks, definitions, tips for execution, and countermeasures to prevent an attack (retaliatory or unprovoked). The book promises to provide “sage advice for the young and the young at heart.” More specifically, it will teach you “how to wriggle out of a noogie-giver’s evil clutches!”

University doesn’t teach you everything, you know. (I know I do. The only thing I truly learned as an undergrad was how to juggle.)

A version of “Read this, sound smart” published in the print and online versions of Dose on April 25, 2005 and is shown below.

Published in Dose magazine, April 25, 2005.