BOOKS | This is a throw down, a showdown, a battle of the book clubs like never before!

If only. The truth is, the whole idea of a book club reeks of high school English class, calling to mind words like “symbolism,” which may make you want to fall asleep. Forever.

Well snooze no more. In this battle of the book clubs, we at Dose pit three celebrity-branded book clubs against each other, and give you tips on how to start a good one of your own.

Let the grudge match begin.

Oprah’s Book Club

The big kahuna of daytime TV recommends books that then immediately steam to the top of the bestseller list. Oprah’s Book Club started in 1996, but took a brief hiatus in 2002/2003. Expect contemporary dramatic literature, peppered with famous classics. Oprah’s Book Club picks are quality literature. The thing that seems to hurt their reputations most is the fact that Oprah likes them. Downsides are the fact that we think the club tries too hard to seem smart. Consider this summer’s choice: Faulkner. Eesh.

Read with Ripa

Kelly Ripa, currently of Regis & Kelly, has embarked on what feels like an attempt to cash in on the void left by Oprah in 2002 (see note about the hiatus, above). Read with Ripa started in 2002, and is already basically defunct. There hasn’t been a new book on the list since 2003! The club’s style was pop-culture pulp fiction and you could expect to read mostly chick-lit and mysteries if you were a member. Ripa’s choices were fast, frivolous, and most importantly, fun, but one can read only so much pulp before the mush goes to one’s brain. This anti-Oprah club seemed to take the whole “lit-lite” thing too far.

Rory’s Book Club

Fictional character Rory Gilmore of TV’s Gilmore Girls heads up this web-based book club for WB viewers who want to “be more like Rory”. Launched in 2003, this club adds two new books to the list every other week. Expect “Rory” to recommend both hot new reads and classics “no self respecting book worm can survive without.” There’s a wealth to choose from and new suggestions coming out all the time, which is great, but of course, Rory doesn’t actually exist, and the club’s chat rooms are populated by easily distracted pre-teens, so don’t expect high-level discourse.

Oprah’s Book Club is the clear winner in this little battle of the book clubs. In addition to regularly choosing quality books, Oprah’s club offers extras like online classrooms and video lectures. Rory places second, and Ripa brings up the rear. Womp womp.

Want to start your own book club?

Resist being sucked in by convention. Let friends recommend titles based on categories like “books that remind you of your childhood,” or “books you stayed up all night reading.” Checking the pretentious at the door makes all the difference.

Published in Dose, June 27, 2005.